New Blog

For me, just for me, I have decided to focus on writing. I am going to park my poems and my pictures ina merged format on a new blog. Peek if you want to.

Ink and Images 

Hey, did you know....?

Hey, did you know that my new meds are working and I am feeling good on most days?

Did you know that Noodle is still dealing with mono and the doctor said that it could be mid-summer by the time she feels better?

Did you know that I have been going to the gym twice a week since late March, working with my trainer, getting stronger?

Did you know school is nearly finished for the year but not before I get buried grading 120 research papers this weekend?

Finally, did you know that Older Daughter will get behind the wheel this summer and learn to drive?

Well, now you know!

That day is not today...

This is a pretty popular poster on Pinterest these days. Every time I see it, I am reminded how I will probably never run again. I might be able to walk a 5k or even jog just a little. But run a marathon, a mile, a 50m dash? Probably never. RA has taken that option away.

I saw my doctor last week and we decided the cimzia was not working. We decided to make another go at MTX and see if the elevated liver numbers last time were just an anomaly. While I was waiting for her to come back with my scripts I decided that my fight needed to go into high gear. I needed to make a decision about how hard I would fight. This disease keeps taking away and someday I may have to give in, but that day is not today. 

There might be a day when I can no longer walk without help, but that day is not today.

There might be a day when I cannot walk on my treadmill, but that day is not today.

There might be a day when I cannot work my muscles until they are sore, but that day is not today.

I joined the Y, I got a personal trainer named Tracy, and I kicked it into high gear. 

I'm not training for a marathon. I'm training for movement, flexibility, and strength. I know there will be days when the pain is too much, the inflammation burning like wild fire, and my energy nonexistent, but  that day is not today.

So, just who has she been smooching?

Noodle swears she hasn't kissed anyone but us, the dogs,  and Mr. Dumbles.

About a week and a half ago Noodle got tired. She got more tired than she ever has been. She got dizzy, and she had headache after headache. She spent a day at daddy's office, sleeping on the couch. I stayed home a day and took her to the doctor. She was negative after a rapid mono test. The doctor suspected a virus and told us to come back if it hung on. 

After about four days of rest she perked up so I took her to school on Monday and despite being really tired, she did alright. On Tuesday she crashed at school. On Wednesday I took her back to the doctor and they drew blood. By this time I was worried. But yesterday we found out it is mono and I could breathe again. Mono, we can deal with. The doctor strongly suggested at least two weeks of rest and then ease back into school. So I'm taking the next two weeks off and then we will be on Spring Break. 

Hmmmm..... I wonder who he's been smooching?

The Real Me...

Angela over at "Pickles on Pizza" has inspired today's musings. She wrote about being Authentic, being real. I struggle with that all the time. There have been times in my life where I felt true to myself and times where I did not. The older I get, the less I feel I have to conform and sacrifice my authenticity to fit in with the group.

When I started teaching, six years ago, I began to feel more authentic than I ever have. The pieces all clicked. And then the dragon of rheumatoid arthritis reared its ugly head and I was swallowed up. At first I fought hard, but I felt I didn't know how to be authentic and fight this disease. I now feel I have surrendered and let the dragon win. 

But yesterday I started fighting again. See, when the dragon wins, I do nothing. So fighting meas doing and yesterday I did. I feel I have a long way to go before I find myself again, the person I was before RA crashed into my life. But writing this, this is a start. 

For Noodle...

Slow down baby girl... No fair growing up so fast!

Wait and see... and a little bit of Christmas

Yup, that's what me and my doc decided to do about my flare ~ wait and see. She offered me a steroid shot, but I declined. I have noticed a wee bit of improvement and she thinks in another month the biologic will be in full force and I will feel much better. She did say that if I change my mind to call and I can get the shot. For now, ibuprofen and rest are working.

We had a small, quiet Christmas this year. Moth's (Man of the house) brother usually comes up, but not this year. He has a new home, so we went down to Texas a few days after Christmas.

The house was cozy and quiet and "santa" really spoiled us.

He spoiled Mr. Dumbles too!

I hope you had a wonderful Christmas and please have a safe and happy new year!